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In our society, pretty wins. “Pretty privilege” is a real thing, always has been and most likely always will be thanks to our human psychology. The good news is that pretty privilege is attainable and I’m going to tell you how you can get it. If you haven’t noticed through the rise of social media and “IG model” culture, you can become attractive and move a step ahead of the average. It sucks ass, but this is the way society is right now. Of course, we all should work to try and deviate society from the shallow path that it is on, but if we’re focusing on the here and now… you just need to play the game. Especially when we’re talking about getting MONEY and other forms of material success.
This post will hopefully help those who are looking to capitalize on their appearance do so.
Being attractive for the sake of this lil tutorial is basically looking like a woman who has her shit together. A woman who always looks GOOD. A woman who gives off the impression that she’s successful in every god damn way (even if she’s only got $23 in her bank account until next Friday). All this and add in a little heaux twist.
Attractive people are more successful.
There are numerous studies that indicate that people who are perceived as “attractive” are more successful. They make more money, live happier lives, are healthier, blah blah blah. The truth hurts… but I think we can all connect the dots. I mean think about it, who’s gonna get the interview- the attractive person or the average/ugly duckling? It’s unfortunate, but most of the time these decisions are made unconsciously. Of course the company is going to go for the well dressed, always put together, polished individual. Pretty privilege can get you far, it can get you preferential treatment, free things… MORE MONEY!! I feel like this is an obvious fact of life so I’m not going to harp on why I think you should put in the work to “become more attractive.” It’s a shitty concept, but the possible benefits though…
Ultimately, it’s up to YOU to decide whether or not you want to subscribe to these admittedly bullshit beauty standards.
BUT. What I will tell you, especially as a WOC and sex worker, is that these things DO make a difference in how people treat you.
Attaining pretty privilege is one party beauty, two parts your mentality, and a whole lot of effort.
Being attractive and getting that pretty privilege is one party beauty, two parts mentality, and a shit ton of effort and hard work. Unless you’re naturally gorgeous (which IS a thing), then you’re probably gonna have to put some work into this. Sorry bitch, life ain’t fair and you gotta work with what ya got.
One part beauty.
Obviously, the physical aspect of this whole thing is a major key. Your personality isn’t gonna overshine the fact that you haven’t gotten your dead ends trimmed in over a year 🤷🏽♀️.
Make up every day, even if it’s only minimal.
Even if it’s only some Bb cream, mascara, and lip gloss it’s essential to portraying the image that you’ve got your shit together.
Your hair always needs to be done.
Put ya wig on. Put the one minute worth of effort into a sleek top knot. Blend your leave out. Every. Time. You. Leave. The. House. Honest to god, nothing screams “THIS BITCH’S LIFE IS IN SHAMBLES” then a girl whose hair looks a mess.
Take care of your hair, always. Deep condition once a week, use products made for your hair type, detangle on a regular basis, etc.
Keep your nails manicured.
I’m not saying go out and get a manicure every week. I’m saying make sure they’re clean, healthy, and that your cuticles are trimmed at the very least. Pretty hands just give off a good impression and are a turn on for a lot of people.
If you do polish or acrylics, KEEP UP WITH IT. No chips, no overgrown acrylics, no one busted nail.
While you’re at it, keep them hands soft.
Finishing touches are essential.
Accessorize. A simple pair of ear rings and a watch go a long way. A good purse that matches your outfit goes even farther.
Adopting a signature scent doesn’t hurt either. I personally go with Daisy by Marc Jacobs or a Chloe scent depending on the time of the year.
Go for a polished look.
By polished I mean iron your clothes, coordinate your looks, plus doing everything I’ve laid out so far.
Looking polished is synonymous with looking professional and rich af.
Finally… TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!!
Stick to a skin care routine.
Stay moisturized AND hydrated!
Make sure you’re healthy!
Take care of your physique… whatever that means to you.
Two parts mentality.
What I mean by this is that you have to be a bad bitch from the inside out. You have to decide that there are no off days, no self pity, and that it’s up to you to control the narrative about yourself.
Confidence is a ho-cessity.
I cannot tell you how to love yourself, all I can do is tell you what the rest of us do… Which is fake it till we make it. Make it so that from the outside looking in nobody can tell that you don’t feel like the baddest bitch I the room.
Major key alert: don’t be a dumb bitch.
Educate yourself on shit that’s relevant to you and yours. People love and are often taken aback by a gorgeous woman who can hold a conversation (misogyny 🤷🏽♀️). Practice small talk, practice talking about yourself, about work-related things, current events, etc. As a dancer, the second most often received compliment that I get has to do with my ability to hold a conversation (after a compliment about my fat ass and pretty face).
This also needs to be applied to the decisions you make and how you conduct yourself. Being a dumb bitch can mean being possessive over your baby daddy who doesn’t even claim you, it can mean spending your last $20 on a dime bag instead of food or something else that you NEED, engaging in petty drama… you KNOW what I’m talking about.
Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying go to college or study useless (to you) things like politics or math. What I’m saying is know how to hold your own in a conversation and make good decisions. Das it.
Commit yourself to the process.
Luscious locks don’t grow overnight. Clear skin doesn’t happen overnight. Building a wardrobe doesn’t happen overnight.
Take your time, take care of yourself, and the results will come.
This also means no days off. 🗣🗣🗣
It’s also imperative that you surround yourself with like-minded individuals and only those who make you feel good and/or inspire you!!
No bums all 2018 and beyond.
The most important part of the mentality is that you must prioritize yourself.
Save your money. Treat yourself. Do this for you and nobody but YOU.
I think it’s pretty self-explanatory that you truly cannot achieve the desired “look” without commitment and a whole lot of effort. If it were easy, everybody would be doing it.
This post is for all my hoes tryna secure the bag and for those who want to dress for the life they want.
Disclaimer 1: I am in no way saying that achieving a certain physical appearance is gonna change your life, your income, or your success… BUT IT DOESN’T HURT TO TRY. Women shouldn’t be judged off of their appearance, period. I’m coming from a place where I accept, especially in my line of work, that “looking the part” is gonna get me where I want to go and faster.
Disclaimer 2: I’m obviously not saying that pretty people are only successful due to their looks. Miss me with that.